Now then, this is an interesting case. ---{Graphics}--- ☐ You forget what reality is ☑ Beautiful ☑ Good ☐ Decent ☐ Bad ☐ Don‘t look too long at it ☐ MS-DOS ---{Gameplay}--- ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☑ It‘s just gameplay ☐ Mehh ☐ Watch paint dry instead ☐ Just don't ---{Audio}--- ☐ Eargasm ☐ Very good ☐ Good ☑ Not too bad / Does glitch sometimes tho ☐ Bad ☐ I'm now deaf ---{Audience}--- ☐ Kids ☑ Teens ☑ Adults ☐ All ---{PC Requirements}--- ☐ Check if you can run paint ☐ Potato ☑ Decent ☑ Fast ☐ Rich boi ☐ Ask NASA if they have a spare computer ---{Difficulty}--- ☐ One click to win ☑ Easy ☐ Significant brain usage ☐ Easy to learn / Hard to master ☐ Difficult ☐ Dark Souls ---{Grind}--- ☑ Nothing to grind ☐ Only if u care about leaderboards/ranks ☐ Isn't necessary to progress ☐ Average grind level ☐ Too much grind ☐ You‘ll need a second live for grinding ---{Story}--- ☐ No Story ☐ Some lore ☐ Average ☐ Good ☐ Lovely ☐ It‘ll replace your life ...Extra... ☑ Dude, what the f*ck?? ---{Game Time}--- ☐ Short ☑ Average ☐ Long ☐ To infinity and beyond ☐ Depends ---{Price}--- ☐ It’s free! ☑ Worth the price ☑ If u have some spare money left ☐ At least wait for sale ☐ You could also just burn your money ---{Bugs}--- ☐ Never heard of ☐ Minor bugs ☑ Can get annoying ☐ ARK: Survival Evolved ☑ The game itself is a big terrarium for bugs *wink wink* ---{Strategy}--- ☑ Click to win ☐ Matching pretty colors ☐ I'm afraid we'll have to use ...MATH ☐ Now this is actual war ☐ Kenny McCormick vs. the armies of hell ---{Comments}--- As alluded to The Hive is an interesting case in so far that anything that isn't directly the game itself is incoherent non-sense. The intro tells of humanity abandoning earth and settling on a new world, they never show up again. Game starts your first worker has just evolved (or maybe re-evolved i couldn't tell you) to the point of sentience emerging from a pool of glowing water. That sentience is you, you're the Overmind. But in case you don't quite know what to do yet dont worry you have an insectoid advisor to accompany you now all of a sudden. Love the moment you gain sentience you're apparently hit with multiple personality disorder as well. Your main goal now? To get to the surface. Why? F*ck if i know! Underground you will slowly fight your way through [random lizard people] until you reach a large temple of them. Defeat the [random lizard people] and you'll see the map (which you can always entirely see, an odd choice tho i actually like). The path goes in 2 directions: North towards an broken temple surrounded by lava South towards an oceanic cave housing a giant hermit crab What now? We go north sacrifice a few of our guys in a cutscene to the lava temple and summon Satan to ask for directions on how to find the ancient hermit crab we just passed by in smell distance. He tells us and that killing it would make him really happy but also that the sacrifice we gave him wasn't enough and we still need to pay a price, we wont. So we kill the hermit crab to take the water orb of wisdom from it. That was level 1 i'll summarize more now you have an idea of how "special" this story is. Eventually the [random lizard people] are defeated and you move to fighting the Charla'toi empire. They look like some kind of chaos cultist human babarians tho it isn't clear if they are all 1 species or not. They worship the drowned god but then sometime didn't so he flooded their capital which is now the drowned city. So thats where we go next. Theres also treasures and ghosts and tombs in most levels. In their capital we seek a pool of pure water of life stuff, using this water YOU can finally get a body of your own, an Avatar. The pool is protected by the most powerful Charla'toi, the Necromancer (why a NECROmancer would protect the cradle of life, who knows), with their capital in ruins the empire collapses, an all out war between several factions rages trying to get a piece of the empire (aka the lizards show up again). So we kill some mega huge charla'toi, cus flex. We reach an area with only a couple lizards strewn over the map. We scout and find an ancient derelict starship which could be one of the human ships we saw in the intro. The humans do show up afterall? Nah the ships infected with some psychic parasite that takes over your scouts while your insectoid advisor completely freaks out and now you have to slowly grind your way through the map fighting stronger and edgier looking versions of yourself. Focus on the hives and queens they carry the parasite if all red glowing ones are dead you automatically win. Rather than investigate further or try to eradicate the parasite we just leave. There once was peace between the underground factions and they had great gates to the surface but when everything fell into disrepair and war the artifacts to power the gates were lost, the orbs we're collecting (why only mention that now? cus the game did) We go to one of the last places the charla'toi still hold, The temple of the drowned god. Inside we engage in highly intellectually stimulating puzzles like "Put specific bug on picture of same bug" and "Literally go around collapsed door" We reach the inner sanctum and the glowing orb of live. Revived, the necromancer shows up again. It is hinted that the power of the orb of live has been leaking into the waters causing the different factions to evolve and gain sentience like we did (obvious time paradox!?) We defeat the edgy wizard who doesn't really do anything necromancer-esque and claim the orb of life. Taking the orb awakens the drowned god, turns out to be a giant lovecraftian tentacle monster with an arena wide insta-kill attack which would be frightening if you couldn't just leave the arena at any time. We kill god, our insectoid advisor goes nuts and corrupted from the surge of power of the orbs, and then hes cool again and we finally go to the surface, not through giant gates but tiny mineshaft staircases. And then John Rico and the Mobile Infantry show up and blow us to smithereens in the outro, like im not even kidding. Also the orbs sometimes talk to you like a second advisor because drugs i'm guessing at this point. __________________________ I would not be surprised if this games story was scripted by AI. The twists and plots and turns and story beats and even some world building are there but mashed into an incoherent feverdream. Gameplaywise the game does nothing new or unique but what it does it does rather well. A good RTS but very shallow and very easy, You can win just by spamming/peppering your enemies to death. The fully revealed map, the fact you can just leave and take breaks during boss fights and the strategic AI level being on par with a dead cat further make this game a complete cake walk. Your only danger is during the beginning of a level when your enemy might succeed in overrunning you, and ressource management overall. Its not a great game, but its a good game and if you like RTS games specially of the easier variant and/or you like playing the insectoid factions like Zerg for example, this game could definitely be something for you. Overall: 7.5/10 (Might be biased because insects tho)
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